MLMM

Secret Lives of Everyday Objects
Imagine a world where everyday objects could talk. What would a conversation between a sentient coffee mug and a grumpy toaster sound like? Would your toaster be complaining about nobody ever cleaning out the crumbs that fell to the bottom, or would your coffee mug be dreaming about new latte art decorating designs that it is working on”

***

“You know you’re overloading me, don’t you? How do you expect my shortest cycle to get everything clean? I know you think you’re saving energy, but give me a break!”

I ignored the daily complaint from the dishwasher, and filled my coffee maker with water.

“I agree DW, she thinks overfilling my liquid space will give her more than two cups. The problem is her choice of mugs. Her favorite coffee mugs are large two cup capacity!”

“I don’t know what you’re complaining about, CM, if she doesn’t clean me soon, I’ll smoke her out of this apartment! She tries to prevent spills covering an old, should be thrown out cookie sheet with foil, but it doesn’t always work. She is scared to do the self cleaning button because she’s afraid the smoke alarm will come on. I can hardly blame her for that, that alarm is deafening! Meanwhile I get dirtier.”

“If you all don’t stop complaining, I’ll have you all replaced! And you know what that means…the dump!” All complainers just harrumphed.

***

Something Different